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#vaginas
A Holiday Message From Arthur Kade
"'If the Gen Pop doesn't understand how brilliant Arthur Kade is, then ""The Year Of The Brand"" will be like an explosion of science, sex, and orgasms, that will mold a generation. ""Generation K"" is upon us.'…Arthur Kade…12/24/09" Awww! More » -
#holidaze
New Year's Eve is so deadly, just walking can kill you. [NYT]
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#clipjob
Gawker.TV: The Five Best Videos Ever of the Day
Today at Gawker.TV, a preview of The Real World: DC seems tame compared to Jersey Shore, Kathie Lee says something dumb again, 2009's Cinematic achievements, a thief gets whacked with a bicycle, and Eva Longoria and her beau ruin Grease. More » -
#opencaption
'Actually, I Think I Will Call PETA'
[Angelina Jolie rats out a crew member for daring to eat KFC on the set of her upcoming movie Salt, which filmed on the Hudson River today. Image via Bauer-Griffin] -
#vacations
Obama's Christmas Vacation
Barack Obama is in Hawaii celebrating the holidays with his family and attempting yet again to forge a long-form birth certificate. And what have pool cameras caught him doing over the long weekend? Having lots of fun!
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#classicads
'No Oppressive Band on the Sack'
This item just needs one committed entrepreneur like Joe Francis to resurrect it. [Copyranter. Click to enlarge] -
#filmschooled
The Nine Lessons We Learned from Nine
Just because Nine, which opened this weekend, sucked doesn't mean that it has nothing to teach us. For instance, it can tell us how to keep a disaster like Nine from happening again. More » -
#photoshopofhorrors
Did Korean W Give Demi Her Hip Back?
Anthony Citrano, the photographer who accused W of Photoshopping Demi Moore's hip, claims that W Korea added a hip onto the same image for their January issue. Also: BoingBoing's been threatened with a lawsuit. [Anthony Citrano Photography via Us, BoingBoing] [Jezebel] -
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#recessionomics
Let's Pretend Court Is College and the Judge Is a Teacher and Jail Is Candy!
The Way We Live Now: Flowing. As we get poorer, we "flow" from expensive places, like colleges, to inexpensive places, like the courthouse, where we are charged with check-kiting. "Flowing" is a nice metaphor for it, don't you think? More » -
#shutuptwitter
The 370 Dumbest Passwords, as Compiled by Twitter
Twitter appears to have learned from its security scare earlier this year and seems to be taking password security more seriously than most Internet services. More » -
#yeehaw
We Must Destroy Yemen Before They Blow Up More Crotches
Good news, guys: Joe Lieberman is declaring War on Yemen! We must war with them now, so that we do not need to war with them later. (Of course, we already have a secret war on Yemen going on.) -
#apple
When to Buy Apple Products
If you're even thinking about buying an Apple product, wait until after you've read this guide to product cycles and refreshes. It's not always a good time to buy—and now might be an especially bad one for some. [Gizmodo] -
#mediacrack
Harder than Ever For Journalists to Get Paid to Be Winos
In your barren Monday media column: wine journalism going the way of wino journalists, a young lady makes a magazine for Christians, Romenesko got jokes, and pay walls cometh. More » -
#thingsweactuallylike
Take a Minute to Celebrate the Untold Genius of Movie Bootleggers
Yeah, all you bitches paid good money to see Avatar this weekend, but what about the people who toil to bootleg the movie so other can see it for cheap. Will you give them your money? Or your thanks? More » -
#history
TMZ's Sexy JFK Pic: The Playboy Original
Update: JFK yacht pic's fake; plus TheSmokingGun.com has a 50-year-old FBI memo mentioning it. And, UPDATE 2: TSG also posted the original 1967 Playboy photo of a sexxxy yacht party that TMZ stole. Here it is! [TSG. Click to enlarge.] -
#foreignaffairs
What Is Going On in Iran, Then?
You were maybe too busy opening presents or seeing It's Complicated and eating Chinese food to read Andrew Sullivan this weekend, but you have probably heard that something is up in Iran.
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#holidayofhorrors
We Kept the Gift Receipt for Your Holiday Horror Stories
You people have nothing better to do this week than recount your awful experiences from the holiday that just occurred. Leave your tales of woe in the comments of our Holiday Horror Story post. The winner will be decided tomorrow! -
#drunks
NYPD vows to test DUI suspects faster, unless they have a Police Benevolent Association card.
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#crystalballs
Cindy Adams Has Seen the Future, and It Is a Scary, Scary Place
NY Post gossip dowager Cindy Adams had no news today because she hasn't had a scoop since the Paleozoic Era. She has resorted to asking psychics what the gossip of the future will be. The answers will shock you.
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#announcements
A Nation Mourns: The End of The Tyra Show
First Oprah, now Tyra. The Tyra Show, daytime television's main source for women to learn about periods, porn stars, and the danger of tacos, will air its last show next spring. So sad. [Gawker.TV] -
#decadeofdumb
Stocks: Crap
The experts agree: stocks are a big waste of time. For more than one reason! You would have done as well, ten years ago, just burying your money in a jar in the yard. More » -
#terror
Why Isn't Anyone Protecting Michigan from the Crotch-Bomber?
Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, the man who attempted to blow up his crotch on a flight to Detroit, is being held in a federal prison in Michigan. His bail is scheduled to be set on January 8. Where is the outrage? More » -
#instantreplay
We Hate Jon Gosselin for Making Us Care about His Apartment Trashing
Someone trashed Jon Gosselin's Upper West Side apartment. It was either his ex-girlfriend, Hailey Glassman, seeking revenge or him seeking attention. Their lawyers disagree! So does the press! Who to believe in this very important case? More » -
#therich
Let Them Eat Guns
Andrew Madoff—Bernie's son—has applied for a handgun permit. To fend off the angry poors, presumably! Once all the Goldman and AIG execs get their handguns, too, things will be back to normal around here. [NYP] -
#charticles
The Two Thousands Reduced to Icons
For those of you sick of reading "decade in reviews," designer Phillip Niemeyer has come up with a chart plotting the culture and history of the last decade for the New York Times Op-Ed page. -
#opencaption
Sin Bad on the Seven Seas
[Sienna Miller and Jude Law continue to rekindle their scandalous romance on a boating excursion with Law's kids in the Caribbean yesterday. Image via INF] -
#lawsuits
Jeffrey Epstein Real Tough When It Comes to Penis Lawsuits
Jeffrey Epstein penis-related legal woes update! The billionaire Bill Clinton pal is currently being sued by 14(!) women who are upset, in retrospect, that they sexually stimulated Epstein for money. He is therefore (legally) harassing them. Nice guy. More » -
#blinditems
Which Model Got an STD from an Actress?
Looks like one guy got the gift that keeps on giving this Christmas. Let's hope a naughty actress, an asexual actor, and two feuding celeb families found something a little less infections under their tree this year. More » -
#moneymatters
US Economy Crippled by Churches
How is the American economy supposed to limp its way back towards some pitiful semblance of prosperity when every time a city has a nice space that would be perfect for a cash-earning business, woops, a church just stole it? More » -
#videuhoh
New Yorkers Celebrate End of Christmas With Fistfight
Gothamites seamlessly transitioned from post-Christmas good will into pre-New Year's surliness, with a violent subway fistfight. We huddle around our laptops and trashcan fires to watch, indulging our ill-concealed bloodlust. Milk this bloody decade for all it's worth, you vampires. -
#legalthreats
Joe Francis: Sore Douche
We were worried that naming Joe Francis Gawker's Douche of the Decade might go to the drunk-girls-with-low-self-esteem kingpin's head. Would he simply rest on his laurels and give up the pursuit of douche perfection? Luckily, Francis has not failed us.
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#gossiproundup
Britney Spears' Big Cute Eyeglasses Deflect Abortion Rumor
Sometimes, a good paparazzi shot makes us stop thinking about rumors and start thinking about whether big eyeglasses are passé, yet. Lindsay has a new beau, her dad has a new excuse, Gosselin's ex thinks someone is framing her. Gossip! More » -
#incriminating
Update: Fake Photo of JFK on Naked Orgy Boat Fulfills America's Steamiest Wish, 50 Years Running
Finally, hard evidence proving Bill Clinton was not the pimpest of presidents. TMZ has a photo depicting a mid-1950s John Kennedy lazing on a yacht with gorgeous naked ladies. Fascinating, perplexing, historic—but, is it real? No, it's fake. More » -
#terror
Leaked: Homeland Security's Post Underwear Bomb Airplane Rules
You saw our unofficial advice guide to flying after the crotchbomb. Here are the new Homeland Security Transportation Security Administration's official security rules. Read on to get all the hairy details. [Gizmodo] - Yesterday - December 27, 2009
