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  • Valleywag Mascot

    Chadrick worships at the Church of Google

    By Jackson West, 5:00 PM on Thu May 29 2008, 424 views (Edit, to draft, Top, Slurp)

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    Metaversality's Chadrick Baker, our adorably optimistic mascot, intends to become a minister in the Church of Google, a new organization for worshippers of the almighty algorithm. Commandments not issued from on high in Mountain View include "Thou shalt not build thy own commercial-free Search Engine, for I am a jealous Engine, bringing law suits and plagues against the fathers of the children unto the third and fourth generations," and "Thou shalt not manipulate Search Results. Search Engine Optimization is but the work of Microsoft." And praying to your new god is as simple as a search query.

    Followers have even posted nine proofs of Google's godliness, thought I'm not sure it would pass a test of logical consistency. The prayers are kinda funny, but the hate mail is rather disappointing — the true believers are probably still busy sending emails to the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. I, for one, am unshaken in my belief in the Invisible Pink Unicorn, blessed be her holy hooves.

    More about Chadrick Baker

    exits chadrick baker

    Chadrick loves looking for work (also: new Valleywag mascot needed!)

    Chadrick, Chadrick, Chadrick. Most of all, we loved saying his name. Chadrick Baker, the virtual-worlds enthusiast Valleywag plucked from obscurity to be our mascot, has been fired from his day job. More »
    Caption Contest chadrickdiana.jpg

    Chadrick loves Diana, and the feeling is mutual

    The act that first brought Chadrick Baker, virtual-worlds advocate and lover of love, to our attention was his declaration of romantic fealty to four Valley foxes.

    Read More: Valleywag Mascot, Chadrick Baker, Church of Google, Flying Spaghetti Monster, Invisible Pink Unicorn, Valleywag
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San Francisco, 3:20 PM
Fri Jul 10
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