Trying to download the Sex and the City movie last night, I had to wonder, When is a torrent site more comfort than a Cosmo? If you can't fulfill your Sex-seeking ladylove's needs with some unpacked .rar files, I understand. So does Best Buy's Geek Squad, which is offering rescue packages composed of quarters and excuses for men who don't want to lose quality videogame time to the premiere of the world's most commercially viable feature-length shoe porn. Geek Squad has it only half-right: Why not save your quarters and hire a girl to be professional company at the multiplex — for your girlfriend? (Photo: Daniella Zalcman)

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