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    Cornell Employees' Email Blunder from Hell

    A tech consultant at Cornell University somehow CCed the entire campus emails to his mistress, a Cornell staffer and fellow married person. The naughty man is in no position to be "SPANKING that FINE ASS of yours" now!

    Consultant "John" and Cornell Business School employee "Lisa" are both married, Guest of a Guest reports, though now that their pictures and email thread are being seen by the entire world those relationships are severely endangered. Blame John's denial fetish: without all that sexual teasing he so clearly relished, he might not have been "WAY TOO FUCKING HORNY" to think straight at work and properly operate Outlook or whatever.

    The full email exchange, apparently copied under the leaked email, is an odd mix of sexual panting, taunting and discussion of the mistress' children (who John apparently met) and their eating habits. It's pasted below, but here are some highlights, via Guest of a Guest:

    (Top pic: Fredonino on Flickr)

    Full thread:

    From: John >

    Date: November 6, 2009

    To: Lisa >, $JSEvents >

    Subject: RE:

    Thanks! Tell him Hi right back at him when ya see him later!

    Hey, can you re-send me that link to the article about Obama, and the one world, NWO? I misplaced the link to that, and hadn't finished reading it yet.

    GOD, I can't stop feeling like you're tickling me, and I can't stop TASTING you!!! This is all VERY DISTRACTING!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 1:58 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    Trevor wanted me to be sure to tell you hi he's up here with me today or around here somewhere (I think he took the bus up to the mall).

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 1:56 PM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Ha! At the very LEAST!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 1:55 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    That's how I hope to go, only to be revived so we could do it all over again. I guess that would mean doing it TWICE!!!!!!!!!!

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 1:54 PM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Ha! Yes, my thoughts exactly!

    Tickled and licked and orgasmed to death!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 1:34 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    I don't think you will either (she said with a devilishly shy grin), but what a way to go.;-)

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 1:32 PM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    GOOD LORD HAVE MERCY ON ME!!!

    And by this method, you bring me right to the edge of release, over and over and over again, yet each time I'm denied,and fiendishly tickled even more???

    I don't think I'll survive!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 1:23 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    I see me sitting in your lap straddling, really.facing you with my legs draped over your restrained arms and then wrapped around you and your chair holding you in place you're pinned and unable to move. I'm leaning back ever so slightly with my hands braced on your desk, helping me to grind my pussy against you.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 1:21 PM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    OH DEAR GOD HELP ME!!!

    You are pushing buttons that are getting me WAY TOO FUCKING HORNY for being stuck at work!!!

    And just WHAT am I supposed to do now??? I can practically FEEL your torturous little fingernails flitting across my stomach, and they're making me ACHE with the desire for RELEASE!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 1:07 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    I have visions of strutting into your office in nothing but a trench coat and CFM heels locking the door duct taping your hands to the arms of your chair teasing your with my nails and tongue, tickling, poking, prodding..and then straddling your rock hard cock. Only to stop just seconds before you cum..and start all over again.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 1:03 PM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Ha! Again, I SECOND that motion! (No pun intended!!! :))

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 1:02 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    Yep, that sounds EXACTLY like something I would do.forget twice, I'd be doing it over and over and over and over again!!!

    and I'd give anything to be doing exactly that right now!

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 1:00 PM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Yeah, you are CERTAINLY THAT for me also Baby! And I second the motion on time to hold you in my arms.

    I think about the time spent on your couch often, in that regard. Plus, I also recall looking deep into your eyes, touching your face, and kissing you SO DEEPLY

    And I also recall your naughty little hands getting very playful, snaking their way down my shirt to tickle!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:57 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    AMEN to that sweetie.you are my ounce of sanity in a very insane world right now .thank you so very much for that.I just wish I could spend more time hiding in the safety of your arms..

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:55 PM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Yeah, me too!

    And you are CERTAINLY THAT for me also Baby, among many other wonderful things! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:51 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    (I like the private porn star best of all hehehehehe)

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:48 PM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    ALL OF THE ABOVE BABY!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:46 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    I knew I could count on you!!! You're my hero!!!! My knight in shining armor!!! My private porn star!!!!!

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:44 PM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    OH, I can SERIOUSLY help you with both of those Baby, don't worry!

    And I will be SO FUCKING HORNY after I get done SPANKING that FINE ASS of yours for hours, you'll be FULL for a week after you swallow me! And I hear that CUM is an excellent source of protein, as well as other nutrients!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:39 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    Because more than half the time, I'm actually just fixing for just Jake as Trevor has already eaten half the house by the time I get home. And the minute we come in the door, Jake is heading straight for his highchair and wanting fed before I even have my coat off. So I fix him something quick (grilled cheese, omelet, etc.). Or over the weekend I'm make a big pot of something so we can have leftovers, which Jake and Trevor don't mind, but I get sick of them within a day or two and resort back to popcorn.I'm bad, I know.I think I need a good spanking.and to be put on my knees and force fed.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:34 PM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Well, the my willing to feed you part goes without saying Baby!

    So when you're fixing dinner for Trevor and Jake, why don't you just make enough for you also?

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:30 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    It's the same thing I had yesterday honey.truth be told, I really don't eat very well anymore. I'm so busy with Jake that I don't have much time to fix anything decent for myself it's easier for me to fix him and Trevor dinner and then throw a bag of popcorn in the microwave for myself.BUT, if you're willing to feed me, I'm willing to swallow each and every time!

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:27 PM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Leftover chicken from last night. And a diet Mountain Dew!

    A bagel is your lunch??? You need to CUM up here more often to I can feed you properly!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:25 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    A bagel and a soda.what are you having?

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:24 PM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Ha! I hear ya!

    What's for lunch today?

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:16 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    .I'm just sitting here eating my lunch and giggling at this whole conversation, we just crack me up!!!

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:15 PM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Yes, you CERTAINLY WOOD Baby!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 12:01 PM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    I'd have you up in the front seat right next to me.and although my car is an automatic, I do know how to drive a stick shift.and I'd be sure to have a stick to shift on my way home.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 11:59 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Ha! EXACTLY where I was going with this sweetie! See, we are on the same wavelength, as usual!

    You have me in the back of your car right now, tied up in the back seat. And you're sitting on me, giggling and tickling, giving me sort of a preview of what I can expect when you get me home! And I am sitting here SO FUCKING HARD from thinking about this!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 11:54 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    That depends on your definition of concerned But if I'm lurking in the dark to get you then conversely, you could be lurking in the dark to get me and just the mere thought of that doesn't concern me, but makes me very wet.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 11:52 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Ha! Too funny Lisa!

    So let's see you like bats, the dark, and the idea of tying me up, kidnapping me, and then mercilessly tickle torturing me!

    Should I be concerned??? :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 11:49 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    LOLOLOL.see, even the powers that be knew how much I liked the dark, so they just shut power of .sadly it came back on which is just as well, cause I was too far away from your desk any way!

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 11:21 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Ha! Oh? And why is that??? :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 11:07 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    That's on my schedule for Monday.first thing.actually, if Don leaves Sunday night, I'll be making a night time raid.after all, I work best after dark.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 11:05 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Ha! What was it you said to me last week? Something about tying me up and taking me home, never to be seen again??? :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 10:56 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    You're sooooo willing.one of the many admirable traits I find so endearing about you.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 10:54 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    OK!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 10:53 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    Let me cum up there and feel ya.I need to see for myself.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 10:52 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    AT LEAST!!! The way I'm feeling right now!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 10:50 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    Yes it would.at least twice!

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 10:50 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    That'll work!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 10:48 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    I'd do a private showing for you babe.just you, me, and your lap.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 10:47 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Only if YOU'RE dancing there Baby!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 10:44 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    You and me both baby.so any big bachelor plans for the weekend?? Kumas? (hehehehe.)

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 10:43 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Don't I wish!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 10:06 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    It (and me) are only a bus ride away.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 10:05 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Wow! I just LOVE that idea! And it would require no extra seasoning, seeing as how it would have your savory juices all over it!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 10:01 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    Uh,a bright blue thong.if you want more specifics you;ll have to just see it for yourself.it could be your lunch;-)

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 9:59 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Well, be specific please!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 9:57 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    A thong of course.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 9:56 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    That sounds VERY SEXY to me!!! What kind of panties do you have on??? :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 9:53 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    I really hate the weekends anymore, how pathetic is that?!!?

    On another note, I look like a damn schoolgirl today. Jake was up at 5:15 this morning and full of piss and vinegar so I had very little time to get ready. My hair's up in a pony tail and I've got on sneakers, jeans, and a sweatshirt.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 9:51 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    My thoughts EXACTLY Baby!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 9:50 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    Damn.wish I could be a bachelorette this weekend!

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 9:49 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Ha! That's it exactly!

    That was a GOOD ONE Lisa! Thanks! I'm going to start calling them that!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 9:47 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    So you get to be a bachelor this weekend, just you and the kamikaze birds.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 9:45 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Hard to say, my wife is on her way down there now, and the family is divided on what to do at this point.

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 9:43 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    How's your mother-in-law? This must be such a difficult time for all concerned.

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 9:42 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Yeah, me too! I thought about you bunches yesterday!!! :)

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 9:41 AM

    To: John

    Subject: RE:

    Glad you're back. I've missed you for sure. but then again, I'm always missing you!

    From: John

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 9:38 AM

    To: Lisa

    Subject: RE:

    Hi Baby!

    Much better, thanks! Here at work now.

    From: Lisa

    Sent: Friday, November 06, 2009 8:33 AM

    To: John Wilson

    Subject:

    Good morning sweetheart.you've been MUCH on my mind this morning. I'm worried and anxious to hear how you're doing this morning.


    Send an email to Ryan Tate, the author of this post, at .