Attendees at the 2014 Social Media Marketing World convention—that's a real thing!—were treated to a rousing song called "Let's Get Social," about getting social. Tickets to the event cost $1,300, and literally everyone who sat through this is now dead.
If you're ever questioning your career choice, remember that you never had to sing this, or listen to it in person:
We're searching for the story
That'll bring us instant fame
So we shoot our "viral video"
And we post it to the Gram
We're looking for the secret
Of Facebook's Holy Grail
We try to keep from paying
That leads to hashtag #fail
(Repeat pre-chorus and chorus then to bridge)
This is proof we need a ban on tech conferences implemented at the federal level.