Last night, TechCrunch rolled out the green carpet (unfortunately, I'm speaking literally here) and lit up Davies Symphony Hall to look like the inside of The Matrix in order to properly honor . . . what exactly, emcee John Oliver wasn't sure.

You already have all the money in the world. Why do you need awards after that? It is absolutely ridiculous. You're no longer the underdogs, it's very important that you realize that. You're not the scrappy people that people get behind. It used to be that people who worked in the tech industry were emotional shut-ins who you could root for. Now those days are gone. You're pissing off an entire city.

This was the comedian's second time hosting The Crunchies, where even the Secrets were meh. Watch this highlight reel of Oliver pulling a Ricky-Gervais-at-the-Golden-Globes while attendees paid between $80 to $120 for the privilege.

John Oliver On The Crunchies: "Why Do You Need An Awards Ceremony?"

To contact the author of this post, please email nitasha@gawker.com.

[Video via TechCrunch]