Marissa Mayer's Sidekick Made $58 Million Just by Getting Fired

A new SEC filing out of Yahoo! confirms two sad things we already knew: it's tremendously easy for a man to make more than a woman, and it's stupid simple to be filthy rich and also be bad at your job. Where do the rest of us sign up?

The New York Times reports Henrique de Castro—unceremoniously fired from Yahoo! after doing a shitty job as COO—walked away with $96 million dollars after just 15 months at the clueless tech monolith. That's a hell of a lot of money to be given to someone who was so bad at their job, the job was taken away from them. But maybe more disquieting is how much more de Castro pulled in than the woman he worked for:

Based on the proxy disclosures, Marissa Mayer, chief executive of Yahoo, didn't make out nearly so well. For 2012 and 2013, she received $62 million in compensation, according to the document, although she is also sitting on millions of shares and options that will vest over time or would pay off if she were to meet a similar fate as her former No. 2.

Yep: Henrique made more money than the CEO of his company. That owes largely to the $58 million in severance he "earned" through the high-profile shitcanning, but the fact remains that getting the axe in Silicon Valley can be just as lucrative—if not more!—than actually doing a decent job. Bonus points if you have a dick, and your company is too busy blindly groping around, hoping it falls into a wormhole back to 1998, to think through its executive compensation.