Sean Parker's Life Has Descended into Hell, Says Sean Parker

You monsters. Shame on you. A Facebook billionaire wants to nudge a few redwoods in the comfort of his own forest, and you think less of him for it? I'm disgusted—and so is Sean Parker, who says he's being "spat upon" and "hunted" by "psychopaths" ever since he got hitched.

The backlash to Parker's backlash is upon us—or really, upon him—and if you believe what he tells The Guardian, he's sure getting it rough:

My wife and I should be happy right now, elated to have been married. Instead we are being spat upon by complete strangers while walking together on the street, cursed at by a waiter in a restaurant who had read bogus media reports about our wedding, and told by complete strangers that we should get our divorce papers ready.

There's online torment, too, says CNET:

"There are crazy people on Facebook typing death threats," said Parker. "There were people — eco-terrorists — on my own Facebook page saying, 'Let's find this guy and put him out of his misery'...Psychopaths are hunting me."

Damn. If it ain't the blogs on your tail, it's the eco-terrorists. But that's fucked up, guys. It's one thing to express outrage that a billionaire can essentially pay off the state of California in exchange for his environmentally harmful dream wedding. But you can't just spit in a billionaire's face, unless you too are a billionaire, and then you can compensate him accordingly. That's how this all works.

Photo: Spencer Platt/Getty