Why didn't the premise of the panel sit right with me? Because venture capitalists laughing at bad startup ideas isn't subversive; it's the status quo. Sure, the crowd was rolling in the aisles. Merlin Mann killed them with his prize-winning social network for thought leaders, Flockdup, which promised to "leveragate your friends."

But in retrospect, it would have been much funnier if the comics had come up with bad pitches for really good businesses, under other names. Would Hornik have funded YouTube if it had been pitched as a way to put videos in auction listings, or Twitter as a podcasting service? (That's how each of those startups got their start, by the way.) Venture capitalists like to think they're so smart — Hornik is just a prime example of the type. If Baio had sent up the likes of Hornik, rather than his fellow entrepreneurs, the laugh might have been on the investors. For a change.

Ben Brown, founder of up-and-coming dating site Consumating, scored a starring role in the Independent Film Channel's SXSW 2006 retrospect. The IFC's online film, Behind the Badge, covers this year's music, film, and interactive fests at Austin's South by Southwest convention. Ben does a stellar job representing the geeks — and by "stellar" I mean that he gets sloshed and shouts "woohoo" a lot.

Behind the Badge [IFC]
Earlier: SXSW coverage [Valleywag]

But there among the big boys is San Fran's favorite do-it-for-the-sex dating site, Consumating (NSFW if you're lucky). I pulled founder Ben Brown over for an IMterview.

Valleywag: So. All these success stories gone wrong. How often has that happened to Consumaters?
Ben Brown: Everything we've heard has basically been, "OMG, I totally met a guy from Consumating last night, and he was hot and we did it. He lives in Brooklyn. I think he might have a blog."
Ben: http://www.amandarin.net/2006/03/first_date.html
Wag: Are you keeping track of these? How many bangs per profile have you logged?
Ben: We don't have accurate numbers, of course, but we speculate as many as 5 or 6 bangs per profile.
And that's just with normal use.
Our power users might expect to get more bang for the metaphorical buck.
Wag: And it's all free, right? Only cost is the loss of the potential for actually meeting people in bars?
Actually, if you started charging, would that be illegal under prostitution law?
Ben: Hardyharhar
Wag: Does anyone actually get married? Your demographic is all too hipster to settle down.
Ben: When someone from Consumating decides to walk down that path, they will notice that our silent footprints will quickly disappear.

After the jump, the law of accelerating hotties.

Mismatched.com [WSJ]

Wag: So the other sites in this WSJ story have millions of users. (Except for JDate, but its 148k users are running the world so they count triple.) You have 11 thousand. Who cares about Consumating?
Ben: 11,000 people care, Nick! And they care deeply.
Let me correct myself.
11,304.
Wag: That's major growth!
Ben: That was in only 3 days.
Wag: 1% a day. You'll skyrocket to millions by Easter.
And then— SINGULARITY.
Ben: Yes, we expect total world domination in w4.
err q4.
Wag: I'll edit that. No one will know you can't type.
One last thing: admit, on the record, how you met your girlfriend.
Ben: Here's the real secret. Katie is actually my sister.
Wag: Thanks, Mr. White.
And when the world starts going at it like bunnies, we'll blame you.

Then stumble over to the Velvet Spade around 900 Red River (near the invite-only Blogger party at the Iron Cactus, which started too early for our tastes). Ben Brown of the Consumating dating site co-hosts with music service Odeo and developer firm (and stellar party-throwers) Adaptive Path from 9 on.

Have fun, careful 'bout your drug choice (unless you don't have a panel to lead tomorrow), and keep that little card with your hotel room number.

Ben Brown: i just got an email from Jason Fried
saying that his book
is "a book of ideas"
Wow!
he's right.
simplicity is golden.
who should read it?
EVERYONE!
do you like ideas?
this book has them!

Ben Brown: "Visit the Getting Real site to get more info on who should read the book"
SERIOUSLY?
jesus.
oh wait
it's not a REAL book
its like, vanity publishing gone digital
I am going to write my "Book" today

Valleywag: so, ok, his 1 real success story is Ruby on Rails, right?

Ben Brown: it's not a success story, nick
it's a way of life.

Valleywag: "Over 400,000 people around the world use these applications to get things done."

Ben Brown: Almost ONE HALF OF ONE MILLION
that pretty much gives him license to REVOLUTIONIZE the web
37SIGNALUTIONIZE

"Getting Real" by 37signals [37signals]

Anil Dash (VP, Six Apart): "Baby, I'd like to acquire you like I'm Yahoo."
Nancy Einhart (senior editor, Business 2.0): "I've been told my compensation package is quite ample."
Om Malik (blogger and senior writer, Business 2.0): "Baby, you can flash my router any day!" (GIGAOM BONUS: "Your office or mine?")
Ben Brown (founder, Consumating): "Wanna cyber?"

James Hong, the Hot or Not co-founder with the naked laptop poster, wins the Dirty Dirty Man prize. "Most popular" goes to Steve Jobs, who had 51 searches at last count. Try out the site, but be warned, the server's getting pounded. Hard.

Slut-o-meter Google promiscuity calculator [Lifehacker]
Slut-o-Meter [Slut-o-Meter.com]