What's Panama? Yahoo's ad system, announced last May, formerly due late last year, finally released at 3 p.m. today. Under Panama, search ads should be better targeted, which should increase the number of users who click on them.

What will I notice? If the changeover goes smoothly, users will notice nothing. From then on, though, more of the ads they see should seem worth clicking.

What will Yahoo notice? Hopefully a higher profit per search. Right now, one analyst estimates Yahoo makes about 60% of what Google makes on any given search. That's the main reason why even though Yahoo gets more pageviews, Google makes more money.

What will advertisers notice? More information and control over their ad campaigns, including a "quality index" that shows them how well a given ad is expected to perform.

Will it work? Eleven thousand employees can't be wrong! Yahoo execs say it'll revolutionize the company, but so do engineers with no press to impress.

What do I say at a business party? "Didn't you hear? Yahoo is back. Yep, I'd grab the stock while it's under $30 before Panama kicks up the earnings later this year."

2. But Silicon Valley's far too dull and serious for gossip.
Yes, that's been the general consensus. Chris Nolan used to write a gossipy column, Talk is Cheap, for the San Jose Mercury News in the 1990s, and Fucked Company provided dirt on all the startups that went bust after 2000. But Silicon Valley hasn't been conducive to gossip. And a lot of the people who work in technology are, at least in up markets, too dazzled by the immaculate future to pay attention to the grime of the present. The less charitable explanation: the companies are uptight; the public relations professionals controlling; and the press supine.

3. So, why start a site?
Well, where there's money, there's excess, and where there's excess, there's gossip. And there's now a lot of money again in Silicon Valley. Oh, and let's not forget Google. Did you know that Marissa Mayer, the anointed queen of Google, used to go out with Larry Page until quite recently? And no one ever ever writes that. So that's why.

4. What stories will you cover?
Well, Marissa Mayer, for a start, and the tech media's obtuse coverage of her background. Unpopular venture capitalists. Larry Ellison's spending habits. The Googlejet. Car park etiquette. The cubicle neighbor's undeserved Porsche. Particularly nauseating examples of corporate jargon. Any story, pretty much, that people talk about, but never see in print. And nothing is too trivial.

5. Who's writing the site?
The writer is Nick Douglas, a hungry little monster who first visited San Francisco just three months ago, plucked prematurely from undergraduate English. Jane Austen's loss is Silicon Valley's gain. Or maybe the other way around. But Valleywag is also open to reader comments, either anonymous or bylined.

6. How can I become a commenter on Valleywag?
Check out the Valleywag comments FAQ.

7. Who's behind the site?
Valleywag is part of Gawker Media, which publishes other gossipy titles such as Gawker in Manhattan, Wonkette in Washington, D.C. and Defamer in Hollywood — as well as tech sites such as Gizmodo and Lifehacker. The company makes money from advertising but not, fortunately, from many of the companies that we'll be poking.

2. Why are comments by invitation only?
Because the Valleywag editor wants to spend more time writing and less time moderating comment threads. While comments are invite-only, everyone has a fair shot to earn an invitation.

3. How can I become a commenter?
A) Find a friend with an invitation to share. Many of the people who we've invited to comment have also received invitations to share with friends. We'll continue to seed selected inboxes with invitations to pass on so the supply doesn't die out.

B) Tip us. We're inclined to invite those who've helped us out by dishing gossip our way. If you're looking to comment, raise your chances by sending tips to us at tips@valleywag.com.

C) Convince us. If you're lurking inside a startup, VC firm, or other Valley company, we're probably interested in having you as a commenter. For instance, we'll send an invite to anyone who works at Google, Yahoo, or Microsoft who asks for one.

D) Blog. If you're a blogger, you've got a stake in what you're saying. Many Valleywag comments invitations have gone out to fellow bloggers whose work we admire.

4. Can I comment anonymously?
Yes, totally. Valleywag's comment system is designed so that you can register and post anonymously. Not even we will know who you are.

Here's how to ensure that you register anonymously. When you click through on your invitation link to the comments sign-up page, create an anonymous username. Then, add an anonymous nickname in your user profile. We won't be able to link your username/nickname with your offline self.

We do ask for an email address so that we can email a new password in case you forget it. To preserve your anonymity, use an anonymous Gmail, Yahoo Mail, or Hotmail account. Or, if you want to remain totally under the radar—and you're good at remembering passwords—just leave the email field blank.

5. Can I be banned from commenting?
Yes, if your comments are excessively self-promotional, obnoxious, or even worse, boring. There will be no warning, and no appeal. (For advice on good comment etiquette, check out Lifehacker's guide to weblog comments.)