We started whipping voice recorders, and Scoble whipped out this monster podcast recorder the size of a small lunchbox. Scobble rattled off some stats, and I added that it was probably good for giving other podcasters inferiority complexes. Bill cracked up, and it made my day. The guy is human. Quite human, as he'd later tell the story of how he got arrested in Albuquerque in 1978.

I'd asked him about the mug shot on Wikipedia, and at first he looked a bit apprehensive, but answered. Apparently, Bill loves fast cars. In 1978, he told us, he'd gotten 3 speeding tickets on his drive to move up to Seattle. Two from the same cop. It was a Porsche 911 from that era. By the end of the story, he seemed to pleasantly distracted. Maybe he was thinking about the sensation of the road tearing underneath him at +100MPH, in a fine German automobile, instead of Vista.

People think about Larry Ellison's fighter jets, and Steve Jobs' hipness. But why does no one talk about Bill Gates' speed freak tendencies? It's a story that isn't quite new, but it definitely isn't told often enough.

From a Time piece on Bill Gates:

When Microsoft was based in Albuquerque, New Mexico, in its early years, he bought a Porsche 911 and used to race it in the desert; Paul Allen had to bail him out of jail after one midnight escapade.

Later, he ripped into Scoble for not quoting numbers when Scoble gently asked about whether or not MSFT was power-saving conscious. "Before you ask the question, do the math...Be Numeric!"

Pwned by Bill! He's actually a cool guy. –Brian Lam

David Weekly: i think this wins the prize for shortest web 2.0 dot-com ever
service began development june 4, launched june 4, tech crunch june 5, c&d june 15
Valleywag: So for our readers, how did you think of your SingleStat.us site, and what does it do?
David: SingleStat.us let you know when someone's relationship status [on MySpace] changed. It was a fun project, something I did to compete in the DHX competition. Of course, I was helping host the competition, so I wasn't an official entrant. :)
Wag: And DHX is the tenth of your Super Happy Dev House coding events. What was the first surprise when you put SingleStat.us online?
David: well, i woke up the next day and we were on [popular blog] techcrunch. i wasn't exactly expecting that. some companies go through a lot of time, money, sweat, and tears before they're featured on techcrunch
David: so then there were all these people who were just *irate* that a web 2.0 company could launch with such a cheap, shoddy model.

David: of course, they didn't really understand that this was something a guy had done on a Sunday. i think they assumed there was a full team behind it with real money.
Wag: And then came surprise #2.
David: heh
the VC lunch
Wag: Which VCs, dude?
David: [laugh] i don't want to piss nice people off. they were more interested in hearing about the thoughts behind singlestat.us than dumping a few million in...i think.
Wag: Give us a hint?
David: South Bay VC
Wag: Have we covered all the surprises?
David: Well, there was a long article in WebProNews about SingleStat.us, about 120 blog entries made in at least six different languages, an entry in USA Today's blog about it, and a morning interview with a Philadelphia talk radio station.
The Cease and Desist received today from MySpace probably took the cake, though.
Wag: So how'd this all leave you? What did you learn?
David: Well, I learned a little bit about viral marketing. I also learned that big companies sometimes don't like small companies innovating using them as a platform. And I had some real fun, which was the whole point, anyhow. This wasn't meant to be a billion dollar idea, it was something fun to do on a Sunday. And I got to know the other players in the stalker space, like DatingAnyone and Stalkerati, as well as inspiring StalkerExchange.com.
Incidentally, I think StalkerExchange may have been launched and shut down even faster than I was.
I may have to cede my speed-crown. :)
Wag: Oh hot. What did it do?
David: Peer to peer stalking
Wag: yeah, it's just a " :( " now
David: was launched this morning i think.
by my friend Eric.
yep, launched at 5:40am this morning. it's now 5:40pm, exactly 12 hours later.
*exactly*
now that is a fast-lived company.
i can do the whole dotCom cycle in two weeks flat.
idea -> conception -> implementation -> deployment -> viral spread -> implosion -> failure! :)
if one in 12 startups fails and i can do one every two weeks...
then i should be able to turn out two successful startups a year!
Wag: brilliant!

SingleStat.us [Now defunct]

Valleywag: Jeremy, first off, how's the role as a PR hottie going?
Jeremy Pepper:Well, not as well as I thought it would be. One person mentioned the contest to me - another guy - who then complimented me on the shirt. Maybe I should play it up on Consumating...
Wag: So about this interview. You told Danny that there's a "core group of like minded PR bloggers." Do you mean the group that ripped him apart last week?
Jeremy: LOL. Somewhat. I was talking more about how a group of us aren't out here to self promote, but to push forward the industry. We all fail together, just like we'll all succeed together.
Wag: Really? Isn't there some PR blogger out there that when they die, they die alone?
Jeremy: Isn't there some saying that we come in to the world alone, and we die alone? We all live and die by the written word, and well, embargoes. :)
Wag: I think that's from Donny Darko.

After the jump, Jeremy makes good for a 200-page fax.

Wag: You said later, "Pink is the new black." What about Pinko?
Jeremy: Well, pink is the new black is just a fashion thing. Pinko? Never been a fan of the nouveau communist mentality, whether it's manifestos, Che t-shirts (except for pure irony), or other terms from that era. Too tied to pogroms for me.
Wag: Have you ever been the whipping boy for a PR pile-on?
Jeremy: Anyone that is in the industry has been. Perfect example - fax machine went nuts (back when we faxed releases) and it ended up sending 200 blank pages to one fax machine. I sent them an apology, and a ream of paper. They loved it, so whipping to genius in one FedEx box.

Valleywag: Tell me the scoop in three sentences.
Memehacker: Alan Ralsky is currently being held by the feds and his file is sealed for the next 72hrs by the DOJ. We are concerned that he is going to narq out the entire network since they have enough on him to send him to jail. This means hackers, spammers, anyone who has worked in spam legally or illegally for the last 5 years at least.
The DOJ wants to do a dragnet, they have the top dog, but they want the whole system as well.
Wag: How many people could be in trouble?
MH: There is a risk of a huge network collapse in the hack scene. I couldn't estimate since I don't know who he has worked with, but it's a lot of people. Think of a huge pyramid with him at the top. He is one of the few people that has knowledge of a large part of the hackscene network.
Wag: What were Ralsky's biggest crimes? How would I explain this guy to my mom?
MH: Ralsky is known as the Spam King. He is one of the biggest spammers out there, his network and spamlists are huge. He is not afraid to use shady methods to bypass filters and to acquire new lists.
He has been known to use the hack scene to help him spam and to get him new lists to work with.

After the jump, why Ralsky would squeal.

Wag: What does he get out of ratting everyone out? And why didn't he do it in 2005 when he was raided?
MH: If he can cut a deal with the DOJ he may get a reduced sentence or even full immunity. I don't know how much he has to offer them, but taking out a network as large as his would definitely give him some bargaining power. I believe this is still the same case as 2005, they just didn't have enough on him back then to really scare him.
Shutting down his network is a lot less scary than jailtime, which was all they could do back then.
We assume that it is more this time since the DOJ sealed the case. They don't do that unless they are planning to do something during that time.
Wag: How many people would get burned? How bad could the fallout be?
MH: It depends on who did what for him, or what he knows about people. I couldn't estimate, but currently a lot of people are very scared.
It's not just about spamming, he knows stuff about other various activities in the hack scene.
Wag: Are we just talking about a bunch of kids here?
MH: Not just kids, legit spam companies that use shadier methods, older people who do spam stuff on the side to make money. There was that case a few years ago of the kid who got aol's user file and tried to sell it. Stuff like that, leaving your company, but taking some info and trading it for money or info. Sometimes people do stupid things because they are upset at their company or something.
Wag: And why get the story out there? What's your motive?
MH: Personally I want the network to be aware of what's going on. Who knows what he is saying in there, no one knows what exactly he knows.
Or what he has guessed.
Wag: And what happens when the file's unsealed?
MH: Even just some stupid kid that bragged to him about buzzing a government network to see if he could.
Then we know what the charges are, what they have on him.
And possibly the deal that was made.

Stay tuned to Valleywag as the story develops.

Q: Facebook just turned down a $750 million offer, saying they were seeking $2 billion. Do consider yourself a million-dollar-kind-of guy or a billion-dollar-kind-of guy?

A: What we're really committed to is providing the best experience, and we're not really thinking about what we're worth. We're just viewing this as solving a really hard problem and that's how to distribute video in an entertaining way. So as we move forward, we're just going to stay committed to that.

In other words, "All the big shots are throwing me Benjamins, baby. So I don't need to beg."

An Interview with Chad Hurley and Steve Chen, Founders of YouTube.com [Gizmodo]

Valleywag: So the drunk story. True?
Sean Parker: it happens
VW: was it really lindsay lohan's fault?
SP: it was some kind of accent, i mean, who doesnt scream in some kind of accent when they're drunk?
i don't think lindsey lohan had anything to do with it. i didn't even see her. though according to my sister she was sitting at the table next to ours.
VW: so that's the only thing you've been kicked out of lately?
SP: very funny...yes
VW: any further comments before we go off-record?
SP: this is my chance to be witty in my own defense, right?

Unfortunately, Sean couldn't think of anything — nothing we could run here, anyway, cause this is a family blog. Thanks for chatting, Sean!

Earlier: Your privacy is an illusion: Sean Parker pisses off Lindsay Lohan [Valleywag]

But what does Josh wear down there? New York may care about Michelle Slatalla's underwear, but it's her husband's undies that Silicon Valley wants to get into (um, metaphorically). Good thing he has Instant Messenger.

Valleywag: You're used to your wife writing about your undies discussions with her?

Josh: I encourage it.
Josh: It keeps the marriage fresh.

Valleywag: So did you two talk about YOUR underwear?

Josh: It's not really a Styles column. Go figure.

Valleywag: Then you have the perfect forum here to discuss your own.
Valleywag: Boxers or briefs, Josh?

Josh: Boxers, of course
[Josh types something but erases it.]

Valleywag: no, go on

Josh: This seems to be overstimulating for you. And i refuse to go on unless you PAY ME.

Since Valleywag has a strict policy of being cheap, the interview had to end.

He Says Lingerie, I Say Underwear [NYT]

Sand Hill Slave: Hey Valley Wag :-) How goes it the land of tech gossip?
Valleywag: Hey!
Valleywag: Right, so, Sand Hill Slave, you've been all over the blogosphere, planting joy in comment threads by linking to your blog.
Valleywag: How long have you been working in the valley?
Sand Hill Slave: long enough to make these observations :-)
Sand Hill Slave: about 5-6 years I guess
Sand Hill Slave: it's like dog years to me.
Valleywag: and you've climbed up the ladder?
Sand Hill Slave: yeah you could say that. climbed up, fallen, climbed back up again
Valleywag: Just confess it — you're John Doerr, right?
Sand Hill Slave: No it's me, Vinod.
Valleywag: vinod, eh?
Valleywag: the former golden-touch vc?
Sand Hill Slave: I'm not so sure any of these guys even pay attention
Sand Hill Slave: I mean an admin.. come on
Valleywag: john, you can't stall us. WHAT WAS WITH THE SEGWAY, JOHN?
Sand Hill Slave: Hey I like segways they are kind of cool
Sand Hill Slave: oooh are you flirting with me?
Sand Hill Slave: I could be a boy
Valleywag: oh, DO tell me that you aspire higher than dating gossip bloggers.
Valleywag: which vcs have you slept with?

Porn in the office and bad Banana Republic after the jump.

Sand Hill Slave: Yes the irony of it all is...I JUST WANT TO DATE A VC.
Sand Hill Slave: umm I've never slept with one
Valleywag: none yet? and you're already blogging?
Valleywag: So tell me about the partners with porn in the office.
Sand Hill Slave: yeah it was awhile back.
Sand Hill Slave: I was cleaning out an office...old board books and the like
Sand Hill Slave: and lo and behold
Sand Hill Slave: I couldn't help but start laughing
Valleywag: it'd make a killing on ebay
Sand Hill Slave: the porn on the computer
Sand Hill Slave: is the big one
Valleywag: so you go around searching for this?
Sand Hill Slave: it's more about cleaning out a messy office
Valleywag: and now you secretly want steve jurvetson to whisk you away on his chariot?
Sand Hill Slave: blonds are ok. but not really into them.
Sand Hill Slave: I just saw that movie Batman Returns and the guy in there...
Sand Hill Slave: He was in American Psycho.
Sand Hill Slave: Wow. how come men I work for do not look like that
Sand Hill Slave: Then I'd really have something to blog about-
Valleywag: so none of the vcs actually turn you on?
Sand Hill Slave: nope.
Valleywag: you must be hiding a raging crush for one of them
Sand Hill Slave: I need someone with a sense of humor. That's my first prerequisite.
Valleywag: and vcs...
Sand Hill Slave: I don't know every VC in the valley, but most of the ones I see/hear/meet
Sand Hill Slave: they are just...well...it is what it is.
Valleywag: and it is...?
Sand Hill Slave: Bland.
Sand Hill Slave: I'm just saying this from a perspective of a woman
Valleywag: so imagine the entire VC partner line-up is in front of you
Valleywag: and right now
Valleywag: RIGHT NOW
Valleywag: you have to get it on with one — or at least suffer through a date with the guy
Sand Hill Slave: hmmm
Sand Hill Slave: I have to look at pictures
Sand Hill Slave: most of them are older you know
Valleywag: that's what makes it so fun for ya
Sand Hill Slave: yeah Viagra has really f*cked things up for the trophy wives man
Valleywag: oldest vc with porn on the computer?
Sand Hill Slave: umm the oldest at the time... I think he was
Sand Hill Slave: probably around mid to late 40's
Valleywag: oh, that's disappointing
Sand Hill Slave: Well to be fair, I'm sure plenty of SV CEOs have smut rags stuffed somewhere in their offices or on their computer...
Valleywag: surely
Sand Hill Slave: why is it disappointing? Men around that age are most likely to stray from their wives
Valleywag: good point. ever found evidence?
Sand Hill Slave: there are plenty of stories in the valley about VCs CEOs etc sleeping with assistants
Sand Hill Slave: the Dresdner Wasserstein case in NYC
Sand Hill Slave: I've had married guys flirt with me
Valleywag: how high up?
Valleywag: can you name just one name?
Sand Hill Slave: people that have worked at my firms
Valleywag: about how many partners have flirted with you?
Sand Hill Slave: you know it's tough because you want to foster a good environment where everyone can joke around
Sand Hill Slave: so it's difficult to determine. and it's an individual assessment
Sand Hill Slave: what you might consider over the line
Valleywag: right, like, if a vc just wants to ride his admin's bare back like a horse
Sand Hill Slave: HAHAHHA
Valleywag: could all be in jest, no harm done
Valleywag: long as it's after noon
Sand Hill Slave: after everyone's gone....
Valleywag: everyone in suits anyway
Sand Hill Slave: yeah you can always tell the east coast guys from that one
Sand Hill Slave: when they show up in suits
Sand Hill Slave: I sometime think "That's some bad Banana Republic you got going on there"
Sand Hill Slave: whatever look you were going for.. you missed.
Sand Hill Slave: (things that go on in sand hill slaves head)
Valleywag: who, among all vcs you've worked for or not, was the most hopeless case, the biggest ego in the most undeserving container?
Sand Hill Slave: hahaha again.. no names from me. As for egos, COME most of them do. It's their nature.
Sand Hill Slave: (come on)
Valleywag: nice freudian slip
Valleywag: you want them BAD
Sand Hill Slave: uhh ok (sand hill slave breaks down)
Sand Hill Slave: (wipes her eyes on her thomas pink shirt and almost takes an eye out with the cufflink)
Sand Hill Slave: you caught me
Valleywag: so when do you show up on yahoo and reveal you're just part of an online reality show?
Sand Hill Slave: I'm sure I'll be outed at one point
Valleywag: yeah, with that self-publicity, how afraid are you of being named?
Sand Hill Slave: Not really.
Sand Hill Slave: Whether it's me or someone else that is doing a blog like this
Sand Hill Slave: a firm would be hard pressed to fire someone
Valleywag: you don't think this blog could get you fired?
Sand Hill Slave: there is no specific mention of the firm or the goings on
Sand Hill Slave: if it did they would have one hell of a lawsuit
Sand Hill Slave: on thier hands
Sand Hill Slave: we might "part ways" with a hefty severance payment
Valleywag: and if you left the business, would you name names?
Sand Hill Slave: maybe
Sand Hill Slave: but these people haven't done real harm to me
Sand Hill Slave: no need to embarrass them
Sand Hill Slave: some guys can be jerks to work for. But maybe in their personal life they are sweet as kittens...
Valleywag: do promise you'll be in touch with me when you're fired
Sand Hill Slave: hahaha
Sand Hill Slave: you bet

Sand Hill Slave [anonymous blog]