Neel Shah, Page Six gossip and former Gawker and Radar-ite, was glad his phone didn't end up with the likes of his present or past employers. (He should be.)

Tech pundit and Berkeleyite Andrew Keen articulated an ideology of what might be called, if you're avoiding Rush Limbuagh-isms, "femifascism."

British Telecom's Kevin Marks hopes that's an iPhone you're discreetly working in your pocket.

Singer Weird Al Yankovic does this every time he flies.

Wired's Dylan Tweney is bookmarking your comments for future reference, haters.

Did you witness the media elite tweet something indiscreet? Please email us your favorite tweets - or send us more Twitter usernames.

Elliot Holt of One Story Magazine brought squirrel porn into the microblogging era. Small animals, small medium. Appropriate!

Marissa Mayer quoted Tom Clancy. We'd never have pegged the Google bigwig as a fan of techno-thrillers, but her and Clancy both strive to make them.

Jennifer 8. Lee's source wish list read eerily like Julia Allison's blogger wish list. We tried not to think about it.

Silicon Valley PR maven Brooke Hammerling might have grown up in New York, but she'll always be a California girl at heart. Judging from her taste in music, at least.

Former Googler Kevin Marks, a social networking guy, took a dig at the type of software that actually makes people more productive.

Did you witness the media elite tweet something indiscreet? Please email us your favorite tweets - or send us more Twitter usernames.

The video is just talking heads, so you can open this one in the background and listen while you update your MySpace work.

Behind The Scenes At Technorati [Ryan Is Hungry]

First up, Stirr, the monthly show-and-tell for startups (photos by Hot From Silicon Valley):

"Hey, you know the organizer Sean Ness? I hear he isn't wearing any panties."

"Guys, I know the party around us is loud, but if we keep our heads down, we can still finish this business proposal tonight."

Caught in the holy light, this man converted to the Holy Church of Web 2.0. He was later seen handing out poppies at the Oakland Airport.

"Please God, just one more button."

"Hmm, who on the balcony looks pitchable?"

"Look at me, I'm a woman at Stirr! How did I even get in here?"

Meanwhile, at San Francisco's Mighty club, blogger Om Malik held the second re-launch party for his blog GigaOM, sponsored by Sharpcast. Four people asked me that night, "What does Sharpcast do?" Who knows, and who cares? They bought the drinks, and they were hiring. They supplied the band too, for which we hate them. Zooomr evangelist Thomas Hawk snapped shots:

In the center, Thor Muller of Rubyred Labs and Valleyschwag, the man who will one day make millions selling elixir from a brightly painted wagon.

GigaOM blogger Jackson West eschewed collar and sleeves, instantly becoming the best-dressed gent at the party.

Note the white rabbit, a nod to the party's Alice in Wonderland theme. The heavy references to a magical world where things grow big when they shouldn't, words mean whatever one wants them to mean, and impossible creatures give drug-induced speeches while celebrating nonexistent holidays, made a better point about the tech boom than I ever could.

The man of the hour, getting some affection from Citizen Agency consultant Tara Hunt. Further photo series analysis reveals: Om only posed with women (who were, as all women, gorgeous).

Technorati engineer Kevin Marks makes a "help me" face.

Little known fact: Laughing Squid founder Scott Beale is rarely seen in photos not because he is usually behind the camera, but because he stands at a 60-degree angle.

STIRR Mixer 5 [Hot From Silicon Valley on Flickr]
Go GigaOm Go [Thomas Hawk]

Valleywag's first SloshCon at the House of Shields was so successful that my hangover's having baby hangovers. Remember the live-audience interviews and speeches on the game plan? Scrapped. We didn't want to ruin the vibe (half the crowd had arrived in the first 20 minutes), so we all kept on drinking and bullshitting one-on-one. (Top photo by Jeremiah Owyang)

Tag your Flickr'd party photos with "SloshCon" — just like the Mopping Up post says.

Irina Slutsky, host of Geek Entertainment TV, and Amber MacArthur, host of commandN and Call For Help — 66% of the blond vlogosphere. [Irina Slutsky]

Irina was overheard telling GETV producer Eddie Codel, "You need to feed me or videotape me, right now!" And who wouldn't gladly do both?

"So your claims to fame are a snarky site called Fucked Company, a nearly fucked company called AdBrite, and recording yourself in various costumes and, most disturbingly of all, your undressed body? And she is willing to date you?" Pud: "Yes." "Oh my God you're my hero." [Adam Engelhart]

A bewildered Jeff Veen points in bewilderment as TechCrunch's Michael Arrington and I (the tiny one) re-enact a favorite Arrington pose. [Brian Oberkirch]

Arrington says he made the first shocker when Tara Hunt went around at a party, telling everyone to do it. At the time he had no idea what the gesture meant. (Sure, Michael, sure.)

A friend of Jeff, by the way, greeted me with "So you're the one who almost fucked up Jeff's Measure Map deal?" (Yes. Yes I am.)

Famous awesome people who showed: Philip "Pud" Kaplan (a Valleywag favorite this week), TV star Amber MacArthur, Jon Grubb and Thor Muller (the Lennon and McCartney of Rubyred Labs), and Michael Arrington (Web 2.0's war correspondent)

Famous less awesome people who must have had a sudden emergency, like, their entire hometown just blew up: Digg founder Kevin Rose

See more of these webstars! Click past the jump!

Rubyred Labs and Valleyschwag co-founder Jonathan Grubb tastes like magic ice cream. [Adam Engelhart]

"Aaaaaah Pud, that's the best man-boy-love joke ever!" [Adam Engelhart]

Technorati principal engineer Kevin Marks and fresh Google hire Catspaw stare into the laptop photobooth of a fellow #joiito IRC chatter (that's at irc.freenode.net), Other Maciej, who has a whole gallery of liberally applied Photoshop effects from the party. [Other Maciej]

Best thing about geek parties is, if you're bored, you can just find a laptop and surf some animal porn. [Adam Engelhart

We had a webcast and a backchannel chat up in honor of the sober vicarious party-goers living in the middle of nowhere (read: not in the Valley). [Adam Engelhart]

Valleywag does Top Gun: "Too close for shots, I'm switching to beer." [Jeremiah Owyang]

That smile says "I don't know they're winding up for a Roxbury hip slam." [Adam Engelhart

Thanks for hanging out, Silicon Valley! Come back in the fall for "SloshCon 2: The Disappointingly Boring But More Productive Sequel!"

Flickr Galleries:
Other Maciej [Flickr]
Jeremiah Owyang [Flickr]
Adam Engelhart [Flickr]

AOL exec Jason Calacanis and VC Fred Wilson recommend spending a homeless year or two. [Calacanis.com]
Technorati engineer Kevin Marks goes manic for microformats. [Epeus' epigone]
Dan Hon coredumps a hefty set of conference notes. [DanHon.com]
He also publishes meticulous notes on danah boyd's "G/localization" talk. Gold star, Dan. [DanHon.com]
JR's brain is full, and the sun glinting off the skin of a thousand geeks has blinded him. [Noded]
All these and more, linked from the Planet ETech multifeed. [Plagger.org]

Photo by Scott Beale [Flickr]

ETech 2006 rolls on, and Scott Beale keeps photographing the folks who make the Internet. Tuesday's highlights include Tim Bray's Indy outfit, Esther Dyson's spelling, and Jen King's primal scream.

Wired futurist Bruce Sterling Sun Microsystems demigod Tim Bray pops in from his Indiana Jones 4 audition.

Tribe.net's Chris Law isn't a friend of Kevin Burton. He just plays one on the Internet.

After the jump, Gob Bluth visits ETech. (Not really.)

ETech 2006 Photos [Laughing Squid, used with permission]
Earlier: Geeking out: ETech 2006 [Valleywag]

"And my Starbucks? Can you merge a tag folksonomy into my Starbucks?"

Simply Hired's Dave McClure: "Does your Google interview story involve a Rubik's cube and an attack dog? Yeah, everyone has that story."

Flickr'ing futurist "Esthr" Dyson: "A pleasre to meet you, I'm chrmed."

Designer Derek Powazek looks like a younger, taller Paul Giamatti. Just sayin'.

Technorati engineer Kevin Marks: "Well, if you don't like the new bubbly look, we'll just change the — no — no, shut up, I'm doing it now — we'll just change the site right back."

Weblogs Inc's Jason Calacanis is not just making a sign; he's worried and would like some peace, please.

Metafilter founder Matt Haughey: "If you bought the Segway to get laid, um, why'd you bring it to a tech conference?"

At the Yahoo party: "Heehee...hi, Mr. Semel? Mr. Terry Semel? Do you have Prince Albert in a can? WELL YOU'D BETTER GO OUT AND CATCH IT. Wait, wait, I messed up. Can we start over?"

Scott says, "[Berkeley student] Jen King's reaction to hearing web 2.0 for the 1000x time."

"Going Overboard Hair Club for Men.com. Works wonders, and it uses Ajax."

The O'Reilly Emerging Technology Conference (or ETech for the impatient) is in full swing today, after a rousing start on Monday. The event sold out ages ago, but through the magic of Scott Beale's photography, we can pretend we made it in. (If you want to pretend you met Cory Doctorow and he loved your sci-fi story idea, have that fantasy on your own.) Here are highlights from Scott's meticulous Monday photojournalism.

BBC blogger Ben Metcalfe is so tired of your bullshit.

"Just stand very still and do not make eye contact, and Tom Coates will walk away."

After the jump, Doc Searls kills a man with one bare fist.

UI designer Ben Cerveny chills with, I assume, a White Russian in a coffee cup.

Gavin Bell to Cal Henderson: "For the last time, I know that you are Cal. Now stop. Saying. It."

Cory Doctorow: "Ohhh man, this post is gonna need a unicorn chaser."

"I am pleased to see my 'impress the ladies with the clever nametag job title' plan has succeeded."

Moments later, Technorati's Kevin Marks tragically rolled over and was crushed by a surprisingly heavy inflata-chair.

"Look, it's okay if you want to wear a kilt too, but bow to the superiority of my tartan, okay?"

TailRank's Kevin Burton waits for the perfect "So, wanna buy me?" moment.

Blogfather Doc Searls answers all dumb questions with a jab to the face.

ETech 2006 Photos [Laughing Squid]