Lodwick's potential swan song goes like this:

1. I'm okay.
2. Sometimes, being made fun of stings.
3. I acknowledge being stung, and move forward emotionally.
4. I compensate for being stung intellecually by writing off the stingers as perpetually unhappy downers.
5. Tone it down, prominent online gossip publications. You're fucking with the potentially advantageous harmony of the universe.
6. You make fun of weird people, but weird people are special, and you are mean.

Or to quote Lodwick:

Most people do not have my resilience. Eccentrics are delicate and need room to grow. Perhaps a gentler or more balanced approach to telling stories of our lives is in order. An attitude of "these guys are crazy but we love ‘em anyway" might be better for everyone than today's apparent mission: "destroy the weirdos".

Maybe he's correct! There's nothing wrong with eccentrics. They're enjoyable. And so are Lodwick's ridiculous exploits: in the same way a newscaster needs news to thrive, Lodwick's been giving us - spoon-feeding us - solid material for two years strong, now. In fact, one week ago was the two year anniversary of our first "Jakob Lodwick" tagged post!

It all started wayback in August of 2007, when the O.G. of Fameballing started dating Julia Allison, who, over the course of her career, has had few reservations about sacrificing herself on the altar of dignity in older to get a little publicity. She's now on MTV, so you can't say she didn't get the job done. Around that time:

"I believe I am an early-stage Fameball, and nothing I do or say will change my trajectory. I will attempt to use this to my advantage," Vimeo founder and Star Editor At Large Julia Allison doinker Jakob Lodwick has been quoted as saying.

And so it was. Lodwick was ousted from the company he started and hit the bong for us all to see. He claimed he was going to act like a normal human being. And then, after trying to start his own record label, is now aiming for New Museum-esque fame with videos like these:

Jealousy from Odwick.com on Vimeo.

And proclamations about how "cool" he is, like these:

I thought I was joking when I said I was so cool for being oblivious to the Super Bowl. But last night after dinner and a dance [sic] performace, quietly walking through the [sic] streetes of Manhattan and fearing for my safety in light of hundreds of screaming, drunken brutes, the joke became real. I do think I'm cool for being totally unaware of this moronic celebration of big men, big crowds, big bowls of dip, big commercials, and little brains.

Mind you, this is a guy who once had a pretty hot tech startup that perpetual money-spender Barry Diller - currently hosing down The Daily Beast with his cash, sans promised Amazing Ad-Model - had invested in. Nobody's denying the guy might have an idea or two about how to get a startup off the ground. Unfortunately, his ego and need for performance - well-documented in his latest video - might be getting in the way.

Either way, if Lodwick wants to avoid the pitfalls of being poked fun at altogether - as opposed to just having to cope with it - he might want to employ the strategy/sage advice devised by our own burgeoning entrepreneur, Richard Blakeley:

Then again, he does work for us. So, there is that. Meanwhile: pretty sure the symbiosis of the universe is gonna be fine. So long as Lodwick keeps feeding us good material, we'll keep reporting on it. Isn't that how it works?

Four months ago, Lodwick writes, he quit pot after realizing "it made me absolutely fucking retarded every time" (emphasis his). But that apparently doesn't mean the Vimeo founder is going to stop taking disturbing, semi-nude photos of himself, or making wacked-out, often half-naked videos. See the pic above, uploaded to Lodwick's Tumblr earlier today, or this new video of him channeling Eminem.

What Lodwick is going to do is make, and post to the internet, lists like these, illuminating just how much time he devotes to various forms of fameballing (a lot), and what he does with the rest of his time ("child's pose," "intellectual devotional," "Egosurfing"):

Lodwick has made quite a bundle from IAC, the company to which he sold Vimeo; the media conglomerate may even still be paying him $100,000 per year salary not to come to work. Perhaps we should all be grateful he's plowed that money into fizzled ventures like music-sharing site Muxtape (basically shut down by the RIAA) and record company Normative (three CDs for sale!), and that he's now obsessively making lists. As Lodwick himself has demonstrated, his sort of money can fuel a much more disturbing sort of late-20s identity crisis than this one.

I closed my blog on June 26, 2008. I could no longer handle the relentless, vicious, public attacks from a digital lynch mob towards the personality traits I have no intention of changing, such as my curiosity and my self-confidence.

The humility here is staggering in its profoundity.

I may be a millionaire but I this sort of thing still hurts... You may conceptualize the Unites States as a great nation. But it’s also a big tribe, with its own irrational taboos. One of them is: don’t talk proudly about your achievements.

We feel for young Lodwick, we really do: it's just so hard at the top taking risks when at any moment you have the choice to live comfortably, unlike 99.9 percent of society.(Photo by Nick Gray)

Here's how this posting should really read:

I am seeking someone with currently high in demand skills to help me build something I hope to make a profit from for free. I am able to invest in websites including muxtape and tumblr, but not the people needed to build them.

Specifically, marketing and distribution can now be achieved at less than one percent of the old cost - especially when you get free labor.

I want to support musicians retaining control of their work while you web minions give me yours for lunch and a subway ride. Try not to think of how I pay my rent while you struggle to pay yours.

The short version: record label 2.0. Some "newfangled" profit-sharing scheme. Lodwick's charm has managed to hook an entire artist on the premise. Too bad three fatal words have killed Normative before it even got off the ground. "We will promote our albums in new ways that are hundreds of times more efficient; ways that record labels don't understand, but are obvious to a seasoned Web entrepreneur." Spicy.