Independence Day weekend and the no-free-pass policy may have kept you from the Seattle Gnomedex conference, but the magic of the Internets again lets you pretend you were there to hear presidential hopeful John Edwards speak and to snark the usual gang of crazy uncles in the backchannel chat room. Photos posted by Scott "no I won't shoot your wedding" Beale at Laughing Squid.

Senator Edwards sees Dick Cheney in the crowd. "Wanna mess, old man? I got two hands here and they're itching to break some neck."

Gnomedex organizer Chris Pirillo and partner-in-crime Ponzarelli try out for a ska band.

Laugh at them now, but in five years these dudes will shave and reveal that they're 16.

Wordpress founder Matt Mullenweg and Microsoft manager Niall Kennedy are blown back by an off-screen explosion, caused when Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer and blog pundit Dave Winer accidentally bumped each other.

Submissive startupper Kris Krug points to his dominatrix, Megan Cole.

This fish wouldn't stop asking for an "angler investment," and when its pun didn't go over well, the damn thing would bite.

The performance by Dave Dederer (of the Presidents of the United States of America) lost the talent competition to an interpretive dance about dynamic web menus.

When techies Chris Heuer and Will Pate decide they've had enough of the tech bubble, they will unleash Cthulhu upon the world and all hope will be lost.

ZDNet columnist Steve Gillmor talked for half an hour before anyone realized he was reciting the Bhagavad Gita in the original Sanskrit.

Philip Kaplan performs the interpretive dance that beat Dederer.

Gnomedex 6.0 Photos [Laughing Squid]