• Today's "Reason that San Francisco is cooler than San Jose" is a warning to vegetarians: In Silicon Valley, waiters forcibly stuff meat down your throat. [Metroactive]
• Apparently everyone who didn't know about the Adobe/Microsoft fight over the PDF format has their heads in the sand. Yeah, they're all probably worrying about obscure news this week, like the US killing the world's leading terrorist. [Planet PDF]
• Thanks again, SloshCon sponsors! To everyone else: If you want to give people money to drink, please sponsor the Gnomedex parties coming up in July. [Ponzarelli]
• Is the Glam.com blog network scamming its writers? (Ha, name a blog network that isn't.) A tipster says, "Apparently their $11m in funding doesn't cover paying out a few cents to their partners." [Celebitchy]
• Songwriter Billy Bragg takes his music off Myspace, saying the site's terms and conditions let Rupert Murdoch's media empire re-use all posted music without paying a cent in royalties. One wonders if News Corp would ever get away with acting on that clause, but either way, YAY FOR LEAVING MYSPACE. [Register]
• Pictured: Best. Caption. Ever. The Register snarks at Dell for throwing Wall Street Journal editor Don Clark...a birthday party. [Register]

¬ New York is now safer than San Fran, according to friends of investment bankers.
¬ Suspects are teens, which is probably why PCs get stolen more than those lousy-for-games Macs.
¬ You can buy the stolen notebooks in U.N. Plaza.
¬ If cops stake out a cafe, they must buy lattes. (Seriously, that seems to be the logic used around the last paragraph.)
¬ San Jose is, as usual, less exciting than San Fran, with laptop thefts but no robberies.
¬ Ice-T ain't the only bad boy who always cruises with a piece in his lap.
¬ Chron writer Jaxon Van Derbeken can't turn down a good "hot spots" pun.

Laptop thieves descend upon wireless cafes [SF Chronicle]
Earlier: "Thank God, I was afraid he was pitching me a startup [Valleywag]

But imagine a "Silicon Valley Walk of Fame'' that featured digital video, or a holographic projection, with audio you could access from your cell phone. Maybe each "star'' would be activated by a silicon chip replica. That could be a fun and sophisticated way to celebrate our stellar geeks.

Until "fun and sophisticated" becomes "embarrassing last-year technology."

S.J. Walk of Fame still a ways off [Mercury News]
Here's a way to let the valley get its stars in alignment [Mercury News]

The O'Reilly Emerging Technology Conference (or ETech for the impatient) is in full swing today, after a rousing start on Monday. The event sold out ages ago, but through the magic of Scott Beale's photography, we can pretend we made it in. (If you want to pretend you met Cory Doctorow and he loved your sci-fi story idea, have that fantasy on your own.) Here are highlights from Scott's meticulous Monday photojournalism.

BBC blogger Ben Metcalfe is so tired of your bullshit.

"Just stand very still and do not make eye contact, and Tom Coates will walk away."

After the jump, Doc Searls kills a man with one bare fist.

UI designer Ben Cerveny chills with, I assume, a White Russian in a coffee cup.

Gavin Bell to Cal Henderson: "For the last time, I know that you are Cal. Now stop. Saying. It."

Cory Doctorow: "Ohhh man, this post is gonna need a unicorn chaser."

"I am pleased to see my 'impress the ladies with the clever nametag job title' plan has succeeded."

Moments later, Technorati's Kevin Marks tragically rolled over and was crushed by a surprisingly heavy inflata-chair.

"Look, it's okay if you want to wear a kilt too, but bow to the superiority of my tartan, okay?"

TailRank's Kevin Burton waits for the perfect "So, wanna buy me?" moment.

Blogfather Doc Searls answers all dumb questions with a jab to the face.

ETech 2006 Photos [Laughing Squid]