Gawker: valleywag, valleywag jobs

Valleywag hiring minion for the summer

Owen Thomas — Fri, 23 May 2008 10:00:00 EDT

A late addition to our list of the worst entry-level jobs in tech: intern at Valleywag. We are hiring an intern to spot stories, write brief items, and run the Valleywag calendar. Only applicants based in the Bay Area need apply. Familiarity with newsreaders and blog software preferred. Send the URL of your blog or other website and resume in plain text to jobs@valleywag.com. The job pays a modest stipend.

Help wanted, apply within

Owen Thomas — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 23:27:14 EST

Valleywag is hiring. Applicants should send nothing but the URL of their blog (or other body of writing, available online) to jobs@valleywag.com. Also, you'll want to have read our conveniently leaked style guide, and found yourself nodding in agreement. Applicants must already live in the Bay Area, or present evidence of the booking of a one-way U-Haul rental. The jobs:

Senior editor: A second-in-command to take turns running the site with the managing editor (yours truly). Broad industry knowledge, editing experience, and wicked sense of humor required.
Nights and weekends editor: A workaholic night owl whose twitchy news sense will keep the site running 24/7, or a semblance thereof.
Reporter: Ideally, a ubiquitous party attendee who also enjoys rummaging through court filings and reading IPO prospectuses. Vicious streak preferred.
Intern: Speedreading feedreaders encouraged to apply. Bonus points if you spot things that end up on Digg before they end up on Digg.

How to write for Valleywag

Owen Thomas — Tue, 12 Feb 2008 17:20:25 EST

New York Magazine has helpfully published Valleywag's internal style guide. Why keep it a secret? The full guide, written by very special correspondent Paul Boutin, follows.

Paul Boutin's notes on the Valleywag voice
THE RAGE OF THE CREATIVE UNDERCLASS We need to put back the Gawkeresque angry-creative-underclass glint to our voice. Just one glint of nastiness per post. I loved Carlson's advice to Paultards on their irrelevance: "Don't just take my word for it. Go to the polls and find out for yourselves." Zing, and irrefutably true.

DENTON'S FORMULA: MIX A PLUS AND A MINUS If someone screwed up in business, find something nice to say about them: "The charmingly incompetent CEO." If someone succeeded, find a way to slap them. "The wildly successful blowhard." Denton says this is a key to Gawker posts about people, and when he got lazy he slipped on it and readers noticed in a roundabout way that the site felt less brilliant.

PEOPLE, NOT COMPANIES OR PRODUCTS Write about Steve Jobs or Jonathan Ive rather than "Apple" as an actor. Or find out who their VP of sales is if they've had a wildly succesful quarter and credit him/her, a nice detail. I don't want to read that the Zune is a flop, I want to read that Wink Twinkerton, head of the Zune division, has done for portable music players what Bill Gates did for CEO sex appeal.

BE INSULTING, BUT BE SURPRISING Calling Ron Paul a loon isn't edgy. Much better was "voting for Ron Paul sends a message. The message is you're crazy and hate the FDA." That's a nice setup and punch line, and a good non-cliche detail rather than an unspecific "loon."

DON'T LET YOUR ANGER GET TO YOU If someone whose politics or opinions you disagree with says something you want to call out, don't do a straight-ahead criticism. Instead, take their argument further to a simple but ridiculous conclusion. When Hillary Clinton proposed a moratorium on home foreclosures and a freeze on loan rates, Jordan Golson asked, "Why not a moratorium on people paying their mortgages? That seems easier."

BEAT-DOWNS ARE BAD You've wrung this out of them mostly, but I still see the young ones do the oldschool Ann Coulter / Molly Ivins thing of insulting someone three times in a paragraph when once would be better. Pick the one best dig and save the others for another time.

NO FISKING If someone says several stupid things in one piece, just quote them and don't rebut each line separately. Do a 100-word version with only the dumbest parts. Readers will get it.

IF YOU WOULDN'T SAY IT IN A CONVERSATION, DON'T WRITE IT Avoid journalist-speak like "He takes umbrage with our statement." You never say umbrage in real life.

AVOID JOURNALIST MATH, USE SPECIFICS Some, many, few ... these are journalist numbers for when they want to imply a trend. Often they're used to overstate the number of people who do or don't do something. "Some feel that Obama ..." Cut that, and instead give me a specific quote from a linkable person that sums up the general mood you're talking about.

ONE JOKE PER POST We've slipped on that. Too many jokes comes across as not having enough to report. Keep the post short and move onto the next one.

BAIL EARLY Surprise readers by quitting on a review or report halfway through it, once you know you've hit the hight points already. Find some reason to explain your exit. Melissa Gira Grant started to summarize the SF Bay Guardian's annual sex guide, but when she got to a piece that was restaurant suggestions, she wrote, "I stopped reading here." It keeps posts short, and breaks the mold of the reviewer who takes 400 words to wind down.

SATIRE AND PARODY Should be used to illustrate someone's foibles. E.g. President Steve Jobs issues the most expensive US budget ever, but it fits in a manila envelope.

JUST NEVER USE THESE WORDS Douche, douchebag, douchery, asshat. Techcrunch uses them, need I say more. (To which I'll add: "teh," "intarwebs," "lulz." - Owen)

If you were actually interested enough to read all the way through, you may just be Valleywag material. We're hiring a reporter. Bay Area applicants only, please, or those willing to relocate and aware of what an apartment costs here. Send the URL for your blog and your five most cutting posts to jobs@valleywag.com. Laid-off Yahoos are welcome to apply.

Valleywag wants to pay you to watch TV

Owen Thomas — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 18:23:01 EDT

It may well be the second-worst job in the Valley after screening YouTube videos for copyrighted content. But we suspect that one of you twisted sorts reading this might actually enjoy this gig. Valleywag is looking for a video producer. Part of the job is sitting on your couch watching TV clips; part of it is getting out and about, digital camera in hand. If you're interested, apply on Valleywag Jobs.

Today in Valleywag Jobs

Thu, 06 Sep 2007 00:58:36 EDT

If you're not Eric Schmidt's girlfriend, in which case we hear there's a cushy gig waiting for you, get ready for a fresh start at Valleywag Jobs:

Lead Designer / Art Director at dynamic start-up - U.S. News Ventures, Reston, VA (Greater Washingto DC areadesign-)
Mobile Hacker - Bebo.com, San Francisco, CA (SOMA)
Director of Marketing - Peanut Labs, San Francisco, CA
Senior User Interface/Experience Designer - Big Tent Design, San Francisco, CA
Marketing Analyst - Equilibrium, San Francisco, CA
Programmer for Web Games Startup - Kongregate, San Francisco, CA
...and more