I don't have a preteen child, but instead, a husband who views "Harry Potter" with much the same excitement. So, last Saturday, I checked Amazon.com's site for the tracking information. Delivered, UPS claimed, to the front door. Curious, since I was sitting about 20 feet from my front door. I called UPS's automated information line and discovered it had been delivered to my former work address. So downtown I went, and by luck, a former colleague was at the office to let me in. No "Harry Potter" to be found, even though a UPS deliveryman had called on the building that morning. I called Amazon.com, which was good enough to refund my money and send a new copy, which wouldn't arrive until Wednesday.

The book did show up eventually — but by U.S. Postal Service on Monday, not by UPS. How a book can simultaneously be delivered to an office's front door and entrusted to the USPS for delivery is a feat of magic beyond my understanding.

Amazon.com, of course, did the right thing in issuing a refund. Occasionally, the company fulfills Jeff Bezos's tired promise of being "customer-centric" — in this case, recognizing that the book didn't have much value to me delivered late. (I had to rush over to a physical bookstore and — oh, the indignity! — purchase the book by handing it over the counter to a human being to have it rung up.) It will incur some expense, but leave the incident with its reputation intact.

But UPS? UPS is just screwed. Its vaunted electronic-tracking system has been revealed as full of lies. The data, after all, is only as good as the people who enter it. Kottke speculates that his deliveryman entered in false information to avoid trouble from supervisors who wanted delivery to go off without a hitch. And, perhaps, to avoid having to make Amazon good on the cost of its refunds.

Instead, though, it's been caught out. And now, I'm not inclined to trust anything UPS tells me about any delivery. How do I know that its personnel aren't fudging the data to make their jobs easier, or save their bosses a buck? If we can't trust UPS with the simple delivery of a book that's precious to kids — and more than a few adults — why would we ever put our businesses in its hands?

Alaina Browne and Anil Dash The foodblogger and Six Apart executive are not pregnant, though Dash has been looking a little chunky.

Heather Powazek Champ and Derek Powazek: Flickr's community manager and the famous Web designer are not pregnant.

Caterina Fake and Stewart Butterfield: Flickr's cofounders made no secrecy of Fake's pregnancy, which ended yesterday with the safe delivery of a newborn daughter.

Jennifer Granick and Brad Stone: The lawyer and New York Times reporter are expecting, and are telling people about it.

Maryam and Robert Scoble: Would you really expect Robert Scoble, whose blogger wife, Maryam, is pregnant, not to blog about the fact?

Now we all know: Ben Trott proved so irresistably hot that his wife and fellow Six Apart cofounder, Mena, found herself in a family way. Until recently, she'd been trying to keep the fact private.

To the pregnant couples: Heartfelt congratulations and best wishes. To Fake and Butterfield: Mazel tov! To Browne, Dash, and the Powazeks: Get cracking! Valleywag is going to need readers in 2025.

(Photos by Anil Dash, edyson, granick, jacksonwest, Scott Beale / Laughing Squid, and simoncast)

The contestants: Alaina Browne and Anil Dash, Heather Powazek Champ and Derek Powazek, Caterina Fake and Stewart Butterfield

Jennifer Granick and Brad Stone, Maryam and Robert Scoble, and Ben and Mena Trott

Gawker Media polls require Javascript; if you're viewing this in an RSS reader, click through to view in your Javascript-enabled web browser.

So instead we had to write heds about attendees such as Andre Balasz, Coralie Charriol and HuffPo dominatrix Rachel Sklar. We did catch sight of protobloggers Jason Kottke and his wife Meg Hourihan. Megnut, as she is better known, also had a beatific glow and belly bump that are the telltale signs of being preggers. Mazel tov! We'll welcome the first of the new generation of super blogger babies.

John Johnson and his cuz Jaime were in attendance. John, who looks like a dapper D. H. Lawrence, took to the stage to talk about freedom or whatever. And Arianna literally videophoned in a performance. But as the night wore on, and as the absence of food and, more importantly, alcohol eroded our wit and work ethic, we started just posting pictures of kittens from Cuteoverload with captions like "Arianna Huffington Slaughtered My Family". Which is true. Meanwhile, our very own new media artist Richard Blakeley was free to roam around the space asking the type of hard-hitting questions that are so often missing in new media. CITIZEN JOURNALISM. TAKE THAT. —Josh

Graphic designer?
Lives around New York City?
Neuroses are charming from a distance?
Whoring himself online so millions of people tell him what to do?

Yeah, last year we called that Jason Kottke.

ODDBALL PUTS HIS LIFE ONLINE [NY Post]

I don't link to videos on sites that look like they might not be able to handle the bandwidth...I don't want to be responsible for anyone's monster end-of-the-month bandwidth bill. The denizens of Slashdot are gleeful about taking down people's servers; I am not.

Maybe Kottke traffic can take down a personal blog or two. But for the record, only 210 web sites are more popular than Slashdot (according to Alexa). Over 12,000 (again, Alexa) are more popular than Kottke.org.

Jason Kottke [Leahpeah interview]

• The New Yorker publishes a followup six years in the making — the wedding of designer Jason Kottke and Blogger co-creator Meg Hourihan. [New Yorker; Photo source: Kottke]
• Mini-Microsoft blogger stops writing; Microsoft now allowed to be huge and ungainly again. [Mini-Microsoft]
• Publisher Tim O'Reilly writes a lengthy response to the Web 2.0 (TM) shitstorm. The upshot: Yes, O'Reilly wants to own the name "Web 2.0 Conference." He's also disappointed in you all. [O'Reilly Radar]
• Blog mogul Jason Calacanis answers Michael Arrington: Jason meant to defuse the rumor that Arrington's TechCrunch reviews are for sale. But since Mike wants to make a public spat out of it, Jason's only too happy to oblige. [Calacanis.com]
• PR Agency Idea Grove wants to cheat test Technorati. Here's some help, just 'cause their site is pretty. [Idea Grove]
• "In McKinsey space," says VC blogger Paul Kedrosky, "no one can hear you scream." The consultants that told eBay not to worry about Google's PayPal killer, now invites other dot-coms to a bull session. [Paul Kedrosky]
• See, it's funny because Google bought GoogleMastercard.com on the eve of MasterCard's IPO. PayPal is screwed. [Simple SEM]
• Someone forgot the first two rules of Fight Club. [USA Today]

The image associated with this post is best viewed using a browser.
Jason to Meg: "I rented it at half-price. But at 6, we need to let a film crew through for 'Bruce Almighty Two.'"

Jason considers wearing this to the ceremony.

Who invited Jack Nicholson?

After the jump, Kottke and Meg catch Saturday night fever.

Photos by Eliot Shepard: Wedding [megnut on Flickr]

"Who's the dude?" "Some guy she found on the Internet."

Blogger Alaina Browne to husband and Six Apart VP Anil Dash: "Perfect, the photographer's here. Shut up and look noble."

Meg's dad will bust some caps in yo' ass, cracka.

It's somewhere between the Electric Slide and the Chicken Dance.

Actually, he was just checking if she'd spilled some wine.

Flickr's Stewart Butterfield, overcome with emotion, needs a hug and a good sit down.

In lieu of wedding gifts, the couple suggests charitable donations. A good idea — unless you want to buy them a $160 saucepan.

[Update: wedding page removed.]

Heather asks Jason why he didn't choose advertising. "I don't like ads," he says.

Jason turns it around. Why didn't Heather use a subscription model? "After all, people are obsessed with you."
Heather: "What?! I don't get that at all!"
Jason: "Well, I'm obsessed with you." He fakes a lunge at Heather. Glorious. She needs some time to calm down.

Jason: "I think Kottke was out of the website before that—"
Heather: "You're talking like Elmo!"

The talk is already tapering; hopefully there'll just be a navel-gazing lull before a pickup, cause we've got 40 minutes of Dooce and Kottke to go.

Woohoo! Heather: "I saw you and thought, 'Well...he's good for links.'" Audience laughtrack goes "Oooooh."

More coverage from Kyle Bunch on Blogebrity.

Photo: jmacias [Flickr]
Live at Kottke-Dooce [Blogebrity]

With all due respect to Ken, Jason, Nick and Elizabeth and all you other bloggin' fools:

Why I live in San Francisco, not NY or LA.

3)I don't have a British accent, the must-have accessory in New York or LA these days. Brits have replaced Southerners, particularly in NY, as the still-smoking heavy-drinking foul-mouthed objects of curiosity for the pseudo-lit set and its hangers-on. Ain't that right, Nicky?

4)Fucking and shopping are not competitive sports here, except for gay men.

Chris Nolan

Dear Chris,

San Francisco-bashing: Like Shooting Fish in a Barrel^TM

1) Eye of the beholder. Okay, San Francisco, generally: pretty. Ish. Sometimes.

Drunks, heroin addicts, poop in the streets: not so pretty.

2) You must be refering to that other mystical San Francisco Ken was talking about.

3) You've been away from NYC far, far too long. Brits are, like, soooo over. And Southerners? Hellooooo 1988!

And as Graydon Carter would say, there's nothing wrong with drinking, smoking and cussing.

4) We'll take competitive fucking and shopping over competitive self-righteousness anyday. Which is sillier: my supermodel girlfriend is hotter than your supermodel girlfriend, or my soy milk is more organic than your soy milk? Tomato, tomahto.

5) Don't hate us because we're beautiful.

6) The only reason why San Francisco is cheaper is because people are fleeing the city like a rats on a sinking ship. Fewer big spenders mean supply exceeds demand and prices fall. (It certainly wasn't cheaper before April of 2000.)

7) People in New York don't recognize Trillin because they're part of the media culture; they recognize Trillin because his picture's on the book jacket cover and people in New York actually read books instead of burning them. (We hear the Berkeley Library has been officially reduced to the Winnie-the-Pooh anthology, so as not to offend anyone anywhere.)

8) Fur: one woman's guilt complex; another woman's portable space heater.

9) I'm trying really hard to understand the appeal of a car town with no parking, crappy public transportation, and massive hills that make casual bicycling an extreme sport and it's just...not...happening. I mean, really. You have trolleys; how can you possibly expect to be taken seriously?

10) Unexpected treats: the noticeably absent crunch of crack pipes under your Manolos when you exit your building; being able to eat a thick juicy steak without horrified glares of disapproval and/or avocado; and being almost as far away from Berkeley as geographically possible.

We can only assume that the heroin dealers have proliferated to such an extent that all breathable air in the Marina is now laced with smack, as heavy narcotics are the obvious prerequisite for a top 10 list that favors San Francisco over New York. Maybe you should come back to New York and detox. (If we hear you talking about what a nice down-to-earth guy that Larry Ellison is, we're sending over a rescue squad; we don't care what you say.)

As for Ken Layne, we haven't done the "L.A. Sucks" issue yet, so I suppose it's a bit premature to talk about skies in lovely shades of slate from which birds periodically freefall, having choked to death on the pollution. But soon!

Best Regards,
Elizabeth Spiers

Current obsessions include but are not limited to, Tina Brown, urban dating rituals, Condé Nastiness, movie grosses, Hamptons gauche, real estate porn, Harvey Weinstein, fantasy skyscrapers, downwardly mobile i-bankers, Eurotrash, extreme sport social climbing, pomp, circumstance, and other matters of weighty import.

So Jason Kottke and Meg Hourihan are leaving for New York. Jason says he never felt at home in San Francisco. Cory Doctorow concurs: he's staying, but he's never felt comfortable. Gaby Darbyshire, another refugee from the Bay Area, is enjoying her first week in New York. I turned against San Francisco living, before leaving earlier this year.
   San Francisco's defenders the few that have piped up on Jason Kottke's message board are sounding pathetic. Jack Greenwood asks Jason: "I make one request of you: Please try to not slam SF once you're gone. This town really has a lot of hard issues to solve right now."
· Off to New York [Jason Kottke]