Dorky polo shirts and khakis are for Wired Magazine photos. Superstar geeks don't dress like they're manning the Best Buy checkout. These five outfits assembled from clothes that you can buy (and make!) online will show off your brand of geekdom: Steampunk, Internet Rockstar, Code Monkey, Master Designer, or Space Cadet. Steampunk The Steampunk buys things to break them. Every gadget in her home blinks, cuts off body parts, or jams signals from something else in her home. Her clothes are built to last — unless she's dressing up for a meeting of the local hardware hackers at Dorkbot. The bod's base layer is a simple "i void warranties" t-shirt from ThinkGeek. Over that, a Sexy Pack hoodie from Threadless, or a genuine custom-built rocket belt ($250,000 with flight training). Pants are simple jeans with extra sewn-on pockets. Steampunks accessorize with tools. Their Swiss Army Knives (always Victorinox) may vary, but safe bets are the SwissMemory (including a USB memory stick for uploading instructions to a hacked Roomba) and the SwissTool for dirty work. When in the workshop, steampunks don't clutter their hands with anything but work gloves, but when out and about they can flash flairs like a typewriter-key ring. Eyes get protected with a pair of real real safety goggles or stylish aviator goggles. Internet Rockstar This dude's too cool for "too cool for school." The only thing bigger than his ego is his sense of irony. But this isn't an ordinary hipster. He's got a vlog, man, and it's gonna make him a star. The Internet Rockstar doesn't wear a t-shirt that couldn't be deconstructed by an English major. If he's got no one to please, he'll pull on a Threadless tee, but everyone has, like, ten of those. So when he's out and about, he'll don something more ironic: A shirt reading "I was internet famous once" or "seen it." Of course, since the Internet Rockstar believes in his heart that he is internet famous, he'll hand you his Moo card showing off his best Flickr photo. He might snap a photo with you (and himself, natch) with his Sidekick 3 at arm's length. Don't bore him, or he'll plug in the earphones on his sewn-in mp3 player and tune you out. Just be thankful he's not podcasting at you. Code Monkey Code Monkey like Fritos / Code Monkey like Tab and Mountain Dew. Code Monkey keep dignity by instituting voluntary dress code. Even if a programmer doesn't need to get fancy every day, he should know how to parlay his range of options into a surprising variety of style. A short-sleeved linen shirt from Ted Baker on Monday (yes! front pockets! but only one pen thank you), a striped shirt on Wednesday. The code monkey may even don some affordable Banana Republic neckties just for the hell of it. Classic-fit jeans keep the look clean-cut but clearly casual. A Code Monkey keeps his socks far from his sandals, and eschews the latter in favor of tasteful loafers (by, say, Cole Haan) or Americana Chuck Taylors. That's not to say a Code Monkey never spends a day in a "Microformats: We do it with class" t-shirt. Master Designer Steve Jobs's turtleneck-and-jeans getup? Yeah, that's cute. The master designer will have none of that. She'd sooner hang in Milan than Cupertino. Like the Code Monkey, she knows a collar is good for her. She and her male counterpart may wear a tee (or even a hoodie, no matter what Details says) under a casual blazer (Banana Republic or thrift store, their choice). As for formal occasions, well, they already decided that while flipping through their Vogues. The Master Designer has recently eschewed the exquisite glassy iPod Nanos of years past for the ultra-wearable Shuffle, but not (of course not!) with the trashy default headphones. She has shelled out $250 for some Shure earbuds. She totes her MacBook (thank Jobs for widescreen!) in a Kate Spade handbag (or, more unisexily, a creamy-feeling Intention bag by stm). As opposed to the DIY Steampunk, the Master Designer knows that conspicuous consumption is the sincerest form of design appreciation. At least that's what her Tesla dealer told her. Space Cadet The Space Cadet is the most unapologetic of geeks, a sci-fi trufan unafraid to get a little cheesy when cosplaying as all his favorite fictional heroes — at once. He hides his eyes behind a cheap pair of arm-less Morpheus sunglasses from The Matrix. His shirt is a Star Trek standard-issue, his neck adorned with Battlestar Galactica dogtags. His pants are the bottom half of a Chewbacca costume, his shoes are the boots of Captain Mal Reynolds from Firefly. His crowning glory, though, is a custom-made Zaphod Beeblebrox head from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (which is admittedly as realistic as the head from the TV version.