This Is The Best Possible Job in Tech Right Now

OK, fair: we make fun of Brit+Co for being a venture capital-backed Brownie day camp. We make fun of Brit for running into glass doors. And yes, there's the plagiarism. But make no mistake: Brit Morin is hiring, and if you don't apply, the joke's on you.

I'm not saying leave your job if you've got one. But Brit is looking for a senior editor, and there's no way it isn't the cushiest job opening out there:

We are looking for a senior editor who can bring our editorial calendar to life through playful and informative content. In addition to dreaming up and writing about on-brand content, you will also work with both the Editorial team and the Brand Partnerships team to concept and integrate written campaigns. You may also find yourself hanging out with the Marketing team to discuss content strategy, including syndication and paid efforts. Finally, you will be the Grammar Queen (or King) of the site, making sure all of our copy is Associated Press-approved, and that we have fun and catchy headlines wherever possible. Yes, we are happy to put that title on your business card. You are also welcome to choose the title Copy Cat. Your call.

That might sound hifalutin and tense, but remember which company we're talking about—being a "senior editor" here would basically make you a daycare instructor with an iPad and health insurance. I absolutely promise you, on the grave of every dead relative out there (mine and yours), you are qualified for this job. Here's a week's worth of material for you, that I'm making up off the top of my head right now:

  • Bees made out of cheerios
  • Button hangers
  • Wire wizards
  • Rice pencil holder
  • Cover your floor with trash, really, just dump it out
  • Baskets made out of foam (any kind of foam)
  • Washi tape contraceptives
  • Bake a cake, but this cake is blue
  • Fun hair

That is every weekday of your life. Then, collect your paycheck and go home. This is the absolute least taxing job in "tech" I can imagine. Sure, you might wonder, Is it wise to make a living Delia's catalog my boss? Normally we'd say no, but there's more job security here than meets the eye. Remember: Brit+Co has been given several million dollars in funding to do virtual nothing. Unless Brit accidentally seals her checkbook shut with a glue gun, this place isn't running out of funds anytime soon—and if you don't get in on it while the getting's good, you'll be kicking yourself. And NO, your shoes will NOT be decorated with doilies and LEDs like they could have been if you applied for this job.

There's also, owing to the fact that the universe is horrible and hates its inhabitants, a chance that Brit+Co will be acquired by Yahoo! or some other giant for a colossal sum, in which case you'll be richer than Michael (of Michael's Arts & Crafts).