What feels like several dozen years ago, Silicon Valley's reformed party boy and his Middle Earth bride celebrated their love (and love of nature) by shitting up part of a protected redwood forest. Now the state is making him build them an "I'm Sorry" app.

Unfortunately, it's not just an app that loops a short animation of Sean Parker mouthing I'm sorry for my materially grotesque and environmentally insensitive wedding ceremony, or a sort of "apologies-on-demand" service for summoning a contrite Parker to your location. No, it's useful and dull, the San Francisco Chronicle reports:

In a novel punishment for a Silicon Valley bad boy, former Facebook president Sean Parker will not only have to fork out $2.5 million to make amends for his environmental blunder at his Big Sur wedding last year, authorities said Thursday.

He must also create a beach-mapping app for the state agency that busted him.


The mobile app that Parker and the state are developing, Christie said, will help beach-goers navigate the sometimes tricky routes around private property to California's always-public coastline.

That's a nice thought and all, but given that Parker's last app venture was a complete and total dud, maybe he could better serve the public picking up highway litter like everyone else.