Why Google Glass Is So Bad and Hated and Will Never Work

Joe Schoech · 03/14/14 01:11PM

People pay thousands of dollars to have lasers shot at their eyes so they don't have to wear glasses. People put little pieces of plastic right on their eyes so they don't have to wear glasses. People hate glasses.

Drunk Googlers Are the New Popular Kids

Sam Biddle · 03/10/14 03:33PM

Austin, TX — Strip away the pretension of the panels, and SXSW is pure leisure time. This rowdy crew swapped contraband wine bottles through the end of the night at one of this week's high budget parties, commanding the room, Google lanyards swinging. Now just think: soon every bar will look just like this.

Google Glass Fanboy Robert Scoble Breaks Creepiness Record

Sam Biddle · 01/02/14 02:17PM

Overpaid manbaby technologist Robert Scoble, famous for unapologetically wearing a face-mounted camera into public bathrooms, has outdone himself: as evidence that Google's face computers will be a hit, he recorded himself talking to a crew of eager high school girls.

Meet the Google Founder's Mistress

Sam Biddle · 08/28/13 09:40PM

Since Google Glass launched to our awe and horror, the company's co-founder, Sergey Brin, hasn't been spotted without a pair. He's placed himself atop the privacy-eroding project, publicly, and inside Google's secret labs. Maybe it's because he's fucking the Glass marketing manager, Amanda Rosenberg.

Physically Flawless Google Glass Nerds Hit Vogue

Sam Biddle · 08/16/13 04:49PM

Is this the "big moment" for face computers? Does pairing a $2,300 Gucci turtleneck or $1,200 Balenciaga boots with a $1,500 pair of gadget glasses make them haute? Will you look like a model—or will the model look like you? No to all of these, of course, but Google's at least scored itself some glossy mag cachet.

Blog Millionaire Warns of Imminent Google Glass Ass-Kickings

Sam Biddle · 07/09/13 12:46PM

Jason Calacanis, who once made a popular thing many years ago and has since been a go-to authority on race relations and poker, is ready with his forecast for the future of Google Glass. There's some bad news: the face computer's ruining his dance floor vibes, and he just might "punch you in the face" over it.

Business Insider Is Having a Nervous Breakdown Over Google Glass

Sam Biddle · 05/03/13 11:51AM

Google Glass will blow you away, nobody is going to buy it, it will change the world forever, it's flawed, it's perfect, you'll never wear it, and you'll never be able to live without it. At least that's the takeaway if you've been reading BI's breathless, schizoid coverage of the trendy face computer.

You Can't Say 'Fuck' on Google Glass

Sam Biddle · 05/01/13 11:25AM

If Google wants a face computer on every paying human, it's going to have to get over its lingual prudishness immediately—because right now, the device won't recognize dirty words, and there's no way to change that. You know, because it's strapped to your face.